Control

I have always been a control freak!

There, I've said it. I'm... a... control.... freak.

Recently the Lord has been working on my heart... my attitude... and my desire to control everything. It's amazing what the Lord will do with you, once you've decided to give Him control. The thing I fear most, losing everything I hold dear, the gripping fear, held me captive. I was captive to myself, and miserable. It was only when I gave my control up to the Lord... really handed each situation... the good, the bad, the ugly, that the Lord has taken my fear, my anxiety, and replaced it with peace. Comforting peace... and true happiness.

It's funny when I think about it... I mean, I am by no means perfect, and old habits die hard. But, it's almost comical when I think about how I was "hoarding" my fears, and my worries. I was acting as if the Lord didn't know them... as if they were too big for Him to handle.... as if I knew better. Me, little peon, me. Just a speck...

I mean, here I am... simple as I am... thinking I know better, and I can handle things on my own. I mean, after all, His is just the Creator of the universe. I mean, I take at least a few hours to make something like a cake... and He just spoke the world and it came into existence.

Why is it, that we think this way? Why does it always have to... "hit the fan" if you will.

Many years ago, I made the decision to follow Christ. But it hasn't been until recently, I let Him have it all. Yeah, I'm taking that leap of faith. I'm holding my Father's hand, and I'm going to jump.

Why is it, that as a child when someone they love tells them to jump from a high place, they'll always put their trust in that adult to catch them... and yet, when the Lord takes us to a place (and it doesn't even have to be high) and asks us to leap... we kind of look at him with one squinty eye and say "you've got to be kidding me! I'm not jumping there. No way Lord." Maybe that's what God meant when he compared the faith that we need to that of a child.

I have a long way to go... but I'm soo glad I'm on this road.

Thanks for listening to the random ramblings this evening...but I'm so calm, and excited... that I just had to share.

half way there!!

If you have been watching the ticker, you know I am half way to my weight loss goal.

Back in October 2010 my best friend Kelly was telling me about a "new" (at least new to me) exercise video. She described it as a circuit training type video where you do 3 minutes of strength training, 2 minutes of cardio, and 1 minute abs. At the time I was going to the gym for an hour each day after school (with very little to show for it). So I said, sure. Why not! What do I have to lose. The video is called the 30 Day Shred by Jillian Michaels.

She also admitted that when she had done this video before, she had never done more than 3-5 days. So... I was up for the challenge. Since I am an insanely suborn person, I decided to start. I did exactly 30 days straight without a single day off. I was very proud of myself.

When the 30 days was up, I had formed an exercise routine (yay! Finally!) that I enjoyed. So I kept it up.

Needless to say, here I sit, February 1st, 2011... I am half way to my goal to lose 40 pounds. I am so excited at my progress. (And also thrilled that I didn't throw away all my clothes that didn't fit... my wardrobe is nearly brand new now!! It's like shopping in my closet!)

So stay tuned!!

K

Also notice my new ticker.... the days until our Hawaii trip!

Leap of Faith

Well, we're almost done with January 2011.

This past month has had me doing a lot of soul searching. Mostly it has had me pondering faith. One evening I was showering, and I was praying. I do this a lot. I feel this is the time I am most relaxed and able to communicate with the Lord. (My other favorite place is in the car in the morning.)

I was praying a prayer that I have been praying for about 4 or 5 months now. We've been praying that the Lord would provide a new job for Jeremy. (This would be a huge accomplishment toward the goal of starting a family.) Then all of a sudden it dawned on me.... the Lord was speaking to me, I feel... that maybe, instead of waiting for the Lord to provide a job and then start seriously thinking about a family... maybe He wants us to take that leap of faith and trust that He will provide the job that Jeremy needs.

Needless to say, I have been pondering this all week. I have come to question "What's the difference between a 'Leap of Faith' and just 'being reckless'?" I have been doing a lot of praying... and a lot of studying the Bible.

If anyone out there is actually reading this, I wouldn't mind another perspective. What do you think constitutes a leap of faith?

Well, those are my thoughts for now....

K

Merry Christmas Everyone!

Merry Christmas! Let us not forget the reason for the season. Jeremy and I pray the best for each one of you out there. May God be glorified through this time of year. He is good, His mercies are new every day, and His love endures forever!

We pray that 2011 brings nothing but good health, and blessings!

Merry Christmas to ALL!!

Kellee & Jeremy

Reflections of the not-so- sleepy...

It is 2:23 am. I'm sitting here hoping I exhaust myself.

I was reflecting on 2010.

Wow... hard to believe it's almost over.

2010... well, I won't be sad to venture into 2011... let's just start with that.

While there have been many memories, and exciting times in 2010... (especially with the house)

2010 has dealt me quite a few hard blows. There have been many days I've felt "down for the count." I can't believe how devastating 2010 was to me... emotionally, physically, mentally, spiritutally. It's been a hard year. I've tried to fight the truth of it all.. but as I've reflected on it the last few hours (since 11pm when I tried to initially go to sleep), I've realized... that I'm grateful there are only 12 months in a year.

I'm hoping 2011 brings many smiles. I'm hoping 2011 brings restoration. I'm hoping that there are a few surprises in there as well. I'm hoping that within 2011 lies peace. I'm praying that 2011 brings new opportunities. I'm praying that 2011 brings a renewed spirit.

*sigh*

I don't want to just blurt out everything on a blog. I'm too private of a person for that... but I will ask, that the Lord grant me the desires of my heart as we enter a new year. 2011, I greet you with open arms.

Here's a another new year. Praying it's the best yet.

Follow the ticker!

Well the last 2 months has been pretty fantastic. I have gotten a little bug within me to work out... a lot! So in combination with eating healthy, and working out every day... I have started losing weight. That's always good, right? Well.... needless to say, I have created a little ticker up at the top. Feel free to follow along with my weight loss journey. Also, feel free to start your own journey.

I have had great success with Jillian Michael's 30 Day Shred. It's a good workout for the 30 minutes. Whew... it sure gets me a-sweatin.

Anyway, as we approach 2011 I have big plans. I have a wedding in May... I wanna look my best... and Jeremy and I are planning our dream vacation in July... Hawaii! I'm determined to look awesome in a bathing suit. Soo.. wish me luck everyone!!

Call to Prayer...

Hey Everyone!

I know I seem to start off every blog post with an apology... I don't want to disappoint, so... sorry for the lack of posts. We're sort of at a stand still. We've been working on a few projects around the house... but most of all we've been tackling the leaves. That's been a full time job! Leaves, leaves, and more leaves. I think we've spent at least 10 hours taking care of leaves in our yard. Last I checked, our yard was still covered. In fact, it didn't even look like we did any. Hehehe

Anyway, as the title suggests... I'd like to ask for prayer. There is a lot going on here and there. Great things, exciting things... but still it would be great to know that there are people out there praying for us.

Hopefully the next blog post will have more updates, and more excitement. Sometimes I feel like I'm living in a snow globe and someone just keeps shaking the heck out of it. Hehe...

Thanks for praying everyone!